Love For The Ladies: Chapter 61 – Once upon a Childhood – Part 4

 

 

 

 

“I just wanted to see some bare boobies but this is way much more! Can I be your boyfriend now?”

 

 

 

“Oh my stars Borage! What are you doing in here?! Get out! I’m naked!”

“I needed to pee but wow June! I like your body. Something strange is happening in my pants.”

“You little pervert! Get out!”

“Are those real?”

 

 

“Of course they are real! Now get out! I can’t believe you! Walking in here, peeking at me.”

“Your naked body made my body do something weird. I kinda like it but confused.”

“Congrats! You got your first hard on now get out!”

“Geeze, you’re no fun.”

 

 

 

I heard June fussing to my mama about me walking in as she was getting out of the shower. I didn’t tell August that I saw his mom naked but I was happy to finally see a live naked lady who was sexy. I’m not sure if I can keep this from August. He might get mad but it was an accident. I didn’t know she was in there. She forgot to lock the door anyway.

“Your pervert son came into the bathroom while I was getting out of the shower. He just stood there, looking at my naked wet body. You need to get control over your kid!”

“I know it was an accident. He’s a little boy.”

“That was no accident! That kid is a pervert! Go do something with him! He’s being a bad kid!”

 

 

“Don’t talk about my bubba like that! He didn’t mean to! May if your dumb ass would lock the door then maybe he wouldn’t walk in.”

“I watch how he looks at me. He planned this. I’m not comfortable knowing he might do it again!”

“It’s not like you have to live here and keep fucking my husband! You can just go! Get out, no one is stopping you!”

“I didn’t ask to be freed from the well. I was content staying in the well as a frog with my lover Keon. I miss him.. I can’t go back since Max freed him. I’m suppose to stay here anymore. Since Max freed me, then he must be my true love. I’m still in love with Keon.”

 

 

My mama had ever intention to only free Keon for the sake to get June to move out and stop fucking Max. Keon was drawn to my mama and quickly hopped out of the well when she called for him by name. Only a kiss from his true love will free him but since my mama is a love genie, her kiss would break it when she’s not his true love. However this was later a fatal mistake for Keon, my mama has deep regrets of it.

 

 

Keon failed to get my mama to love him and time run out since being freed. A curse was placed on him, he was turned into a zombie and one night he came across the wrong house. He frighten them, he didn’t mean any harm, they shot and killed him. But before that, he was drawn to my mama and ignored June. This was the last straw for June and she left with a broken heart. She took August and her twins with her and moved across town. Months later, my mama gave birth to Dodder and Erica. Keon wasn’t seen much since the birth.

 

 

Time when by, I got older and taller. I was a sexy 12 year old man now. I dressed a certain way, hoping it would impress the ladies. But Riverview was still full of hags.

 

 

 

I wish August was still here. It would be nice to have another boy around. My sisters still annoy me with their problems that I don’t give 2 fucks about. I had a little brother now but Dodder was just a baby and didn’t do much.

“Then she asked Ian out anyway! She knew that I liked Ian but the slut went behind my back and asked him out! Can you believe that?”

“I don’t care! Ugh! Go away! Ian is a jerk anyway.”

 

 

“I need your help.”

“How?”

“Use your magic to banish her to hell!”

“No!”

“You gotta! Daddy said it’s your job to look after us girls!”

“I’m not gonna banish your hag friend to hell cause she asked your crush out!”

“I’m telling daddy!”

“Yeah? What is he gonna do it? Ground me in an email? Go ahead!”

 

 

“IAN’S LAME!”

“HEY!”

 

 

“How dare you! Ian isn’t lame! Ian is a lot better than your lame short boyfriend Dimitri!”

“Hey don’t you talk about my boo! He’ll grow some day! I told him to drink more water anyway. You’re such a loser, Ian wouldn’t want you anyway if Ashley didn’t ask him out.”

“That’s not true! You’re just a hater cause your boyfriend sucks!”

“At least I have one!”

“You forced him!”

 

This was a daily thing, my sisters arguing over boys at our school. It was annoying having to hear about every single day. I couldn’t get away from it or hearing about girl gossip about who started their period or who stuffs their bra. Sisters are so lame.

“BOO!”

“Borage! Stop scaring me! I’m telling daddy!”

 

 

 

August would come over and he’ll bring over his younger brother September and sister October. Celsia never made October feel welcome whenever she came over. October never did shit to her but I think Celsia lashing at her over jealousy. Max plays with October, cause that’s his daughter. We just his step kids but we are step kids he doesn’t like cause he doesn’t like our dad. But I was tried of Cece of always picking on her, so I had to teach her a lesson.

 

 

 

“Hey Borage! Can I come up?”

 

 

 

“No! But you can cool down! Ha ha ha ha!”

 

 

 

 

“HEYYYYYYYYY!”

 

 

 

“You look like a wet bird! Now go fly away! Ha ha ha ha!”

 

 

 

“I hate you!”

 

 

 

It took away before I came to terms that Tequila is the closest I’ll have to a brother close to my age. Out of all of my sisters, she annoys me the least. Tequila was more of a tomboy, she prefer race cars over dolls. She acted less of a girl around the others and they hated her. I have a better relationship with her than I do with the others.

“Yo B! Can I come up? I wanna prank my idiot mom!”

 

 

I always had a good laugh at Tequila’s pranks on Rosette. Cause she always fell for it.

“Mom! I found a love letter from dad!”

 

 

“Well give me that letter you dumb brat! How many other love letters you been hiding from me?!”

 

 

 

“I got a whole bucket full!”

 

 

 

 

 

 

“By the way, dad hates you!”

 

 

 

“HEY! Is there room for one more?”

 

 

 

“You know there’s always room for you up here! I can easily push one of my sister out this tree.”

 

 

 

This was the last summer that I got to see August. He delivered some news that I didn’t see coming.

“Were moving next month.”

“To a better house?”

“Yeah. Well I hope so.”

“I hope so then I’ll come over.”

“But you can’t…”

“What do you I can’t come over to your new house?”

“Cause we’re moving to Roland Heights.”

“But that’s far away from here..”

“I know, my mom got a job there so we gotta leave.”

We kept in touch as much as we could. Through email, IMs, Simbook and by phone. But after a while, we grew apart. I heard from him since we were teens. Max made trips to Roland Heights but refused to take me along. I wonder if he’s still there.

 

 

We remained in lame Riverview, living our lives until we were old enough to live on our own. Finn was doing well with his singing career here. He gained a gig at a local park but the promotion for the show was terrible. No one showed up. It was just us. We were forced to listen to Finn sing terribly.

 

 

Celsia and I got along better whenever we had to attend Finn’s gigs. We would crack jokes about his singing. Insulting Finn’s lack of talent was a bonding experience for us. But it didn’t change the fact that she annoys the hell out of me.

 

 

 

“When I was a young boy, growing up in the ghetto. Hanging out on corners. Singin’ with the fellas.”

 

 

 

“How did you did this gig? Your singing sucks! You never lived in the ghetto! Mom said you were a rich white boy living in the suburbs!”

 

 

 

“Ugh! Don’t start twerkin’! Didn’t you learn anything from Twerk City 3? Every time a white person twerks, they’ll get hit by a Newsea teddy bear with riding a wrecking ball! Just stop! You’re embarrassing!”

 

 

*********

 

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Love For The Ladies: Chapter 58 – Once upon a Childhood Part 1

The beeping.. I can hear it again. I swear it’s driving me nuts. I quickly made a decision on a door so I didn’t have to listen to that annoying beeping noise anymore. I just hope that I picked the right door this time. I need to find my guide so I can get out of here and wake up to be with my family again and ask Clarissa to be mine.

 

 

 

The past. Doesn’t look I didn’t go back too far into my past. This was some years ago, I went to Sunlit Tides for my birthday and to visit my mama and meet my youngest brother Giovanni. Couldn’t believe that my mama was still having babies. Giovanni was born shortly after my brothers’ big birthday party back in Twinbrook. I didn’t know my mama was pregnant. Maybe that’s why she didn’t come to the party. But I got to meet the little guy.

I know Max wasn’t his dad seeing how he’s part vampire but my mama is clueless on who Giovanni’s dad is. One night my mama and Max went to a party and got trashed. They have no memory of that night. A special drink was given to them if they wanted to enter the VIP area. That’s the last they remember. My mama woke up the next day and saw a guy with dark guy leaving the room and Max wasn’t in sight. Max was passed out on the beach naked. Weeks later, my mama learned she was pregnant.

 

 

My aunt Rosette ended up pregnant that same night as well. However she remember hooking up with the mailman who’s named after a fruit. The mailman happen to be a merman. Rosette had the nerve to name her son, Sexy.

 

 

Giovanni should be 18 by now. I should probably touch base with him, when I wake up. I should him the ropes on being a ladies man like me. I’m his big brother after all and he shouldn’t waste his genie magic on hags. In fact I need to touch base with my other younger brothers as well. It sucks that one of them is a basic human like our useless dad. I’m not sure if I can really bond with my non genie brother.

 

 

While I was there, Max my step dad wanted to talk to me. He aged some and had matured over the years. He wanted to apologize to me on how he treated Celsia and I when we were kids. He felt that he should had acted more of a step father to guys. He felt like he treated us like shit. He ignored us for the most part. He didn’t like us cause he hated our dad. He wanted to make things right and hope we could have a relationship.

Suddenly he wants to be a father figure to me. I’m grown and don’t need a father figure but seeing how I hate my own father, I guess having Max around wouldn’t be so bad. Maybe my kids would know how it feels to have a real grandpa. One who isn’t trying to make 100 kids and will have more time to see them. Max wouldn’t be busy making a bunch of kids. But seeing this made me think of my childhood. Then suddenly.. my childhood was flashed before my eyes..

 

 

My mama wanted memories of my sisters and I when we were little. We often had photos done. This was back when I actually liked Celsia. Or did I? I think I was too young to hate her just yet.

 

 

If I didn’t have so many kids, maybe I would have had photos taken but I didn’t plan for this the happen. It just did. I love giving ladies my magic and their eggs like catching that magic. Yeah I could wear condoms but I like not wearing one. It feels better not wearing one.

 

 

 

I know I’m my mama’s favorite…

 

 

 

 

Just look at me, I’m the most sexiness toddler you ever had seen. My mama said the photographers always love taking my photos when I was little. I know that had to cause I was a sexy toddler.

 

 

 

I just wish that my twin wasn’t such a bitch all the time. Maybe we could have gotten along better like we did when we were little. Mama adored us. But I know she liked me better cause of my mad sex appeal. She knew I would be the one making her the pretty grandbabies.

 

 

 

As we got older, we did have photos taken that much. Partying hard became more of the thing with my mama besides we were kinda difficult when it came to having a simple pic taken. Cell phone pics were good enough for mama.

 

 

 

Celsia started to act more of bitch. She was always yelling at someone in the house for whatever reason. She always wanted to be the center of attention. So needy and thirsty. It was annoying I swear. I feel for Clark with him living with her. I’m not sure how he deals with Cece.

 

 

 

But when she wasn’t acting like a bitch hag, we played just like any other kid would.

“You call that a push. You’re so weak!”

“Shut up or I’ll push you so hard that you’ll fly to the moon.”

“Whatever loser! I like to see you try!”

“I’m tempted.. That way I don’t have to see your dumb face anymore.”

“Whatever! You’ll miss me too much, dummy-head!”

 

 

 

I was glad that I wasn’t the only boy in the house. I was the only son between my dad, my mama and aunt. Having August around was a life saver. He was just a step brother but we didn’t see it that way. We were like real brothers since we were the only boys in the house.

 

 

 

His mom was a frog that Max freed from the well. Her name is June Sutherland but I don’t remember her being so damn hot. She must have went into CAS. June stayed with us for a while.

 

 

 

She and Max had a thing going on but June grew tried of being the other woman and moved out taking August and my other step siblings along later on. I guess my mama didn’t mind Max having a live in girlfriend in the house since she cheated on him with my dad. This is why I had an issue with relationships. I grew up in this type of thing were it was normal to have more than one lover. This shit was fucked up when I think about it.

 

 

 

 

Max only kept her around cause she was hot but she was kinda dumb.

“Where did I put that baby again? I never remember where I put the baby. Maybe I should tie a bell around the baby’s neck that way I can find him. Oh shit.. Where did I put the other baby at? Max is gonna be pissed that I lost the babies!”

 

 

 

“Damn it baby number one! Where did you go?”

 

 

 

 

I do have fond memories of this old house in Riverview. Dinner time was always fun. I forgot that my cousin Regret was once a blond. I wonder when did she change her hair? I always had an annoying sister-cousin believing they were a queen. I wanted to kick the chair so bad but mama was around so I didn’t. I’m pretty sure mama would have laughed.

“I’m gonna change my hair.”

“Why?”

“Cause my mom hates it. She said I look like my loser dad with the blond hair so when I get older. I’m changing it.”

“Your mom just hates kids. That’s why you have a dumb name. She regrets you.”

“That’s not true. She loves me, she just hates my hair and my daddy. Besides if I change it then the aliens won’t harvest my eggs.”

“What eggs?”

“My girl eggs.”

“Huh?”

“All girls have eggs, right auntie?”

“I’m not in this conversation.”

 

 

 

“Bow to your queen!”

“How about you go jump in front of a truck?”

“That’s no way you talk to your queen! Off with your head!”

“You have no kingdom. No one likes you.”

“Yeah huh! This room is my kingdom and I am the queen. Now bow before me!”

“I’m about to go crash into your kingdom with my race car.”

“You bet not or I’m telling daddy Finn on you!”

 

 

 

“Where are we going, bro?”

“We are gonna crash into Amaretto’s kingdom!”

“Why?”

“Cause it sucks! You ready? Turn on your turbo rockets!”

“I’m ready! I got my turbo rockets on!”

“Good! After we destroy Amaretto’s kingdom, were gonna pick up some sexy ladies.”

“Why?”

“So we can kiss them and look at their boobies.”

 

 

 

“What are you two idiots doing? I need to sit on the couch so I can eat my salad.”

 

 

 

 

“We are gonna kill Amaretto’s kingdom with out race cars then pick up some sexy ladies.”

“Yeah, we are gonna kiss them and look at their boobies.”

“Yep so if you don’t move out the way, AC you’re gonna get ran over and die.”

“So move or die!”

“I’m about to speed up!”

“Me too!”

 

 

 

“You guys really can’t kill me. Your race car is a couch! And what sexy ladies are you gonna pick up? There’s no sexy ladies here. Why you wanna kiss them and look at their boobies. You boys are gross!”

“It’s called “pretend” AC you should try it some time!”

“Yeah what Borage said, it’s you try it!”

“So you’re gonna pretend to kiss ladies? Weird.”

“It’s not weird not! We got practice before we meet a real lady.”

“So you’re gonna kiss each other?”

“Eww no! I can’t kiss August.”

“Why not, Borage?”

“Cause we both have a dick!”

 

 

 

“You can’t kill the queen with your lame race cars, losers!”

 

 

 

Day camp, I remember being sent to day camp on my grandmama’s expense. She felt it went be good for us to go to a day camp during the summer. Mama and my aunt were happy to drop us off so they could go party more. But I remember having fun there.

 

 

 

“You didn’t see that..”

“Yeah I did Cece. You stepped on the 6. So now it’s my turn.”

“I didn’t mean to.”

“Yeah yeah.”

“Let me have a do over. You’re like way ahead of me.”

“There’s no do overs. It’s my turn.”

 

 

“This game sucks. You always win at it. You never let me win. I’m the little sister. You should let me win for once. It’s only fair.”

 

 

 

“Ah yeah! I win! I’m so good at this.”

“I hate you! You never let me win!”

“I’m not suppose to let you win. You have to earn it.”

“Well.. I don’t wanna! I wanna win!”

 

 

 

“Wanna play again?”

“No! You’re just gonna win again like always.”

“I’m sorry that I’m actually good? Don’t be such a big baby about it.”

“I’m not a baby! You’re just unfair!”

“Not I’m not, you’re just a sore loser. I’m gonna go play with someone else until you cool off.”

“Whatever! Don’t come back!”

“Ugh.. such a brat. How can Borage stand you..”

 

 

 

Truth be told, I was the only one besides Acacia who would play with Celsia. Cece was always a brat but I didn’t pay her much attention at camp. August and I liked to shoot hoops. We had a contest to see who made the most baskets.

 

 

 

 

This would be fun to play with a dad. I didn’t see my dad much but when I did he was in town for a day and we didn’t do much. I would have liked to shoot hoops with him but I never got the chance. August had Max and they played. After August was done, Max would look at him and say he was tired. Other times I waited around hoping he would let me join in.

One day Max made a comment saying maybe I should call my dad if I wanted to play so bad. That actually hurt me. And it still hurts me when I think about. Max did remember that day when I was in Sunlit Tides and said he felt like an ass for saying that to me. He was just mad and shouldn’t had taken it out on Celsia and I.

 

 

 

August and I often made bets. Whoever made the most shot within 10 minutes was the king pimp of the day and the loser had to play with Celsia for the rest of the day.

 

 

 

“Yes! I won! I get to have fun today. Have fun with princess bratzilla!”

 

 

 

 

They had some computer there so course I took advance of it. I was able to disable the child lock and gain access to the chat rooms so I could chat with some sexy ladies online.

 

 

 

“my name is borage”

“hi borage! im miranda. a/s/l?”

“what that mean?”

“age sex location”

“8 yes here”

“ur only 8?”

“yeh”

“ok ur too young 2 be on here”

“no im not. im a sxy 8 yr old and im a genie. can i see ur boobies?”

“hello?”

“hey?”

 

 

“What are you doing?”

“Chatting with sexy ladies but every time I tell they that I’m 8 they stop talking to me.”

“You’re suppose to tell them your real age. Add a one to your age, dummy.”

“I should say I’m 81? Then I’ll be a gross old man!”

“No idiot! Say that you’re 18!”

“Oh..”

“hi im 18 can i see ur boobies?”

 

More pics from the photo shoot

 

 

Happy Birthday to the Montigo-Gelman kids!

Then

On August 15, 2012 I originally had 5 little babies born into the legacy. They appeared in Chapter 5 of Party Montigo. They are the only Montigos who I remember the actual day they were born since I released the chapter soon afterwards. However in the toddler pic you’ll notice a extra kid. At the time I was trying out toddler poses and forgot to move the extra kid out of the shot. That’s August, Borage and Celsia’s step brother.

 

 

Now

I knew they were going to be my favorite set of kids. However I didn’t spend a lot of time on them when they were kids. One of my biggest regrets. Yes, I do have a second childhood file but I haven’t played with it so much. Again, a extra sim in this pic. Mojito wasn’t originally born the first time around. When I played their old save, Rosette had a extra baby. I thought Mojito was too cute to just walk away from. I cleverly added him into the legacy last winter. He did grow up with his siblings but is trying to bond with them as much as possible.

 

 

 

I thought about doing a little special but decided not to since I want to work on a chapter. I have a few photos of them in IP. I thought about showing them all taking a trip to celebrate their joint birthdays but it may come later. I’m thinking of showing flashes of the event in their own stories when they reminisce for a moment.

 

 

 

 

It’s been too long since I last seen them all in one house. Things get a little crazy since they have most of a fun traits. Borage’s first move was to insult Amaretto but with her diva trait, she let him know that wasn’t cool lol

 

 

 

I see that they still carried on their personalities naturally. Martini always felt out and is the butt of every joke. Martini isn’t the brightest and was always a easy target to be picked on.

 

 

 

However Borage’s personality had taken a slight curve. Adding the inappropriate  to him seemed to alter his personality. I’m thinking of the changing it in the near future. It works well with Tequila but not so much for Borage. I gave it to him so he could immediately try to make out with a lady the moment he meets her. I portray him to straight forwarded who jumps the gun. However he tends to be more of asshole with insulting anyone in sight. I rarely seen Tequila do so but Borage does it often and it’s very annoying. I’m just deciding on which trait he’ll trade it with.

 

 

 

Mojito is very forgiving and doesn’t mind Borage’s asshole-ness but I’m tried of it.

 

 

I did a random quick pose challenge with them. It’s where to select ‘random quick poses’ with the pose player add on, on each sim. Then you try to make each posed sim work together. It was fun but irritating when a sim stop posing. I figure I had some dead poses that I need to remove. I know a had a lot of kid poses that no longer work.

 

Where are the Montigo-Gelman kids at now?

Borage – He’s currently living in Evansdale County but I’m vague about where he lives cause has been placed on different worlds recently. Finding a nice world with enough space that doesn’t lag is difficult.

Celsia – She’s currently living in Hidden Springs. I’m debating if she should move or not. I remake her town and now it lags. I may need to remove some sims or something. I’ll figure something out.

Martini – She made a return in Party Montigo and stayed in Sunlit Tides. But PM is having a time jump. I’m unsure what to do with her. I thought about dropping her off in Celsia’s story.

Amaretto Sour – I had plans for her to make cameo appearances in Party Montigo. She would be living in Sunlit Tides with her boyfriend and daughter. But I don’t know if I’ll have Gen 2 of Party Montigo in Sunlit Tides or not.

Tequila Sunrise – Currently she’s apart of Tango Inferno and living in Lucky Palms.

Mojito – Mojito is due to appear in Borage’s story at some point and also in Dodder’s. Mojito isn’t sabled so naturally he doesn’t have a place he calls home.

 

Sims be Cray Cray: Ep 1.

Disclaimer: I am Black. OMG! Calm down. I will not try to steal your car. “Try”.  My sense of humor is very colorful and can be borderline offensive but still funny. I’m pushing it a tab bit but still holding a lot back. There are some some things on here that some may find offensive that could be borderline racist. But if you’re sensitive about racial jokes, hit that X. I don’t wanna hear your bitchin’. You had be warned. If you don’t care, carry on! Keep it juicy!

 

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Party Montigo: Extras Part 2

Liam thinking: She can play the guitar well. I having that she can play with.

 

 

 

Liam: Hi June.

Acacia: June, whatever you do.. Stay away from that guy…

June: Okay.

 

 

 

 

Damn.. blocked  by a child.. Still want that girl. I’m in love.

 

 

I wonder why Rosette insisted that I only use this bathroom. She’s kinda strange.. It’s a nice bathroom tho. This tub is nice but odd.

 

 

The side of this tub is made out of glass. Hmm.. Wait a minute.. I know why.. She installed cameras in here!

 

 

Rosette over the intercom: OMG LIAM! YOU’RE DROWNING!

 

 

Rosette over the intercom: Thank goodness you’re alive Liam! I thought you were drowning!

Liam: So you can see me?

Rosette over the intercom: Yes! Now shake your penis!

 

 

June: And CDs and stuff!

Liam: Right. So do I have a chance with you?

 

 

No little brat! That titty milk is for Liam only, so hands off!

 

 

You can have a vodka & sprite or cake. Take your pick, kid. The titty milk is off limits so stop trying, Girl-Liam! IT’S FOR DADDY-LIAM!

 

 

June: Liam totally dropped his towel in front of me and winked at me.

Max: Okay.. but did you fuck him too?

 

 

That’s right world.. I was the one who taught Celsia how to walk.

 

 

 

Liam: No, you can’t enter.

Rosette: And why the fuck not?

Liam: Just cause…

Rosette: Who’s in there? Zinnia?! That hoslut better not be in there!

 

 

Rosette: I hate the way you eat. I hate this house. I hate your clothes. I love you.

Liam: nom nom nom nom

 

 

Rosette: Let’s get married in Sunlit Tides!

Liam: No.

Rosette: I’ll kill you if we don’t.

 

 

Rosette: Lemme take naked pics of you.

Liam: You have enough.

Rosette: I WANT MORE!!!!

Liam: Okay okay okay…

 

 

Liam: Zinnia:

Rosette: What about her?

Liam: Where is she?

Rosette: Why? I’m here. You love me!

Liam: Was hoping for a threesome.

Rosette: I have second personality, there’s your threesome!

 

 

Rosette: OMG Liam! You’re so gross and nasty! You don’t flush! You don’t clean! Just so nasty! Ugh! I love you no matter what boo!

 

 

 

Liam: What are you doing?

Tequila Sunrise: Oh nothing. Don’t sit yet.

Liam: Okay.

 

 

Rosette: Stop your evil shit, Girl-Liam! How dare you prank my man like that! First you try to still his titty milk when you were a baby, now this?! Ungrateful evil kid! Stay away from my man!

Tequila Sunrise: But… he’s my dad.

Rosette: Oh yeah.. stop being evil!

Tequila Sunrise: Stop being a horrible mom!

Rosette: You know I will always be a horrible mom! Deal with it!

 

 

 

Rosette: I’m sleepy! Liam let me sleep with you again!

Liam: You should go home with your family now.

Finn: So you been here with him? You cheated on me with jerkules AGAIN?

Zinnia: Busted!

 

 

Finn: Why Rose! I loved you!

Rosette: You know I don’t like you! Don’t act brand new!

 

 

Amaretto Sour: You’re the weirdest kid I ever known.

August: Cause I’m always happy?

Amaretto Sour: How can you be happy living here? You smoke? Please share!

 

 

Finn: How many times did you fucked jerkules behind my back?

Rosette: You know I can’t count!

 

 

Amaretto Sour: Something exciting is happening over there. Let’s all look excited about something.

 

 

Celsia: Whips and chains!

Amaretto Sour: Poles and G strings!

Borage: Drunk ladies and roofies!

 

Shiny things!

 

 

Tequila Sunrise: Ugh Mom! Put some pants on! I’m trying to eat here! I don’t wanna see your ass all hanging out!

Rosette: SHUT YOUR MOUTH GIRL-LIAM! I’m waiting for Liam to show up! I gotta be ready and sexy!

Tequila Sunrise: Dad needs to get a restraining order against you!

 

 

 

Acacia: Since I’m the only smart one in this family, take my advice. Never dye your hair black.

Borage: Why?

Acacia: Be my guest if you want to wake up to find Rosette in your bed thinking you are your dad.

Borage: She’s already hit on me a few times….

Acacia: LOL

 

 

 

Celsia: What are we standing here waiting for?

Borage: I’m waiting for the ladies. I know they are looking for my sexy self.

Celsia: They are not looking for your dumb ass. They are avoiding you!

Borage: You’re just a jealous hag! You’ll never be as sexy as me. Hate on hatette.

Celsia: I hate you.

 

 

Rosette: AC, you’re smart? You can read AND write?

Acacia: Yes. What was left of mom’s genius was passed on to me.

Celsia: I think I got some of it too!

Acacia: You didn’t. I have it all. I’m going to a top college.

Celsia: I did too! Cause Borage sure didn’t get any! He’s a idiot!

 

 

Celsia: My grades are good, I swear! Some smart was passed on to me but not Borage. You’re not the only one AC.

Rosette: There’s no hope for any of mines. My kids are all idiots.

 

 

Tequila Sunrise: What are you doing?!

Borage: Testing out my sweet dance moves for the ladies. When I move to Starlight Shores, all the ladies wanna piece of this.

Tequila Sunrise: I doubt it!

Borage: Whatever hag! Since I’m a genie I’ll tell the ladies if the rub my dick 3 times I can grant them a wish. One great night me!

Tequila Sunrise: Ugh! You’re so gross!

Borage: Shut up hag-face! You’re just gonna be one of those easy drunk hags too. These lines will work on you too, hagzilla!

Rosette: I hate all these kids…

 

 

Damn it Liam! Save me from all these idiots already! I picked out my wedding dress too for our wedding in Sunlit Tides!