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If you had suffered from abuse of any kind or find that type of subject difficult to read. You should skip this chapter.
My mom’s restaurant becoming more popular and busier as time past. My mom thought maybe it’s time that we moved into the city. It means I would have to attend a new school where the kids would still hate me. However my mom found it hard to give up her house in Canosa which was given to her by her grandmother after she passed. With business booming, my mom was able to afford a second home.
It wasn’t long before my mom rented out a small house just 3 miles from the restaurant. We lived there during the week, and stayed in Canosa during the weekend. I didn’t have dinner at home like other kids anymore. My mom made sure to cook a meal on the side during her work hours. After school I would come to the restaurant, have dinner with my mom then help out or do homework. By 7pm I would walk home and wait for my mom to come home to tuck me into bed.
Living in the city during the week wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. The kids at the Monte Vista school were a lot nicer than the kids in Canosa. They thought me being a lycan was cool, and I was well liked. I finally have human friends. School was fun and more relax than in Canosa, I’m glad that we moved. But as I walked home each evening, I always felt I was being followed. I knew it couldn’t be Tyrese, the scent was different from his. But every time I turn around, I see nothing…
On this night, my walk home was a little longer. I wanted to hang out by the downtown fountain and see what do the adults do. I always liked to people watch, I often wonder what is their life like. Was it better than mine? Did they have lots of friends? Do they have a big family? I wasn’t sure why my 10 year mind thought about things like that but as I got older, people watch turned into a hobby, photography.
While living in the city, my mom decided to sign me up for ballet. I loved to dance and I was excited about ballet class. The girls were nice and thought me being a lycan was cool too. My mom got me a ballet barre for my room back in Canosa. I love using it whenever we were back home. I had big dreams to be a famous ballet dancer, if only it could have came true…
Things were looking up for my mom in the love department, Simona was around more even when she didn’t need to train me. I wasn’t sure about the relationship between my mom and Simona. I didn’t understand it at all. I always seen a man and a woman in a loving way but not 2 females. Things like this wasn’t explained to me as a child. My mom and Simona may of thought their relationship was hidden from me, but I knew. I was okay with it but knew I wasn’t gonna be a big sister anytime soon.
My turning was well managed, I didn’t have many unexpected turns like I use to. However during a full moon, I didn’t have much of choice. My mom foolishly thought if I went to bed early, it would prevent me from turning. Like clockwork, once it struck midnight, I was awaken from my bed.
Turning wasn’t so bad now. Less painful and a lot easier. In fact I loved it when I turned. My mood was brighten, I felt braver and this gives me an excuse to see life at night.
Simona felt training while turned during a full moon was for the best. She would be waiting for me and we would head towards the park for training.
However on one summer day in Canosa, my life would forever be changed. It started out like no other summer day at the park. I invited a couple of human friends I made in Monte Vista to spend the week with me. My mom took us to the park. We played in the water fountain, having the time of our 11 year old lives.
I stop playing long enough to get a snowcone. After paying the cashier, I walked over to make a lime flavored cone. I was stopped in my track once my eyes laid upon Tyrese. I haven’t seen him since Simona scolded him for threaten me while I was walking home. There was something off about him this time, I should have ran but I didn’t. Instead I made a fatal decision to speak to him.
“You’re looking good I see. Simona training you well?”
“Yeah, she’s the best!”
“I bet. I can tell she’s been training you well.”
“You look fit, filling up in some places. Places I like.”
“I’m not sure what you mean but thanks?”
Tyrese seemed a bit awkward, he watched me make my snowcone then followed as I went to sit on a near by. Tyrese watched me as I ate my snowcone. He licked his lips softly as he watched me. I thought it was a sign that he wanted too so I offered.
“No, that’s okay. I want something sweeter than a snowcone.”
“I think ice cream would be cooler but they don’t sell gelato here.”
“Clarissa, how would you like to be apart of a pack?”
“I want to but my mamma will say no. She said that my papà said those are bad.”
“Your papà was stubborn, being a lone wolf is dangerous. If he were in one, then he would be alive today.”
“If I’m not in a pack, I’ll die?”
“You won’t live as long as pack members do. You won’t be as strong as pack members are.”
“But Simona is training me. I’ll be strong!”
“But you won’t be as strong as us. You’ll always be weaker. If you were to wander on a pack’s territory, you’ll be easier to kill. I can make sure you’ll can be in my pack.”
“Oh.. but my mamma-“
“Clarissa, your human mother doesn’t know what’s best for you. She foolish like your papà was. I want you to join once you’re older. But there’s something that needs to be done first. It will make it easier for you to be accepted in. Just follow me.”
“What do you have to do first?”
“Let’s say it’s a little initiation.”
“I’m not sure what that is. Will it hurt?”
“Not if you put up a fight.”
“I’m confused. Why are we going into the boys restroom?”
“Promise me you won’t scream.”
“Huh? Do I have to eat bugs?”
I shouldn’t followed him. I shouldn’t talk to him. I should had run, ran as far away as I could. My innocence was taken that day. Nothing was the same since this day. After he finished… I don’t even want to say what he did.. He ordered me to put back on my swimsuit and remain quiet. I quietly sobbed as I got dress, he gently pats my face and whispers, “Good girl.” I quickly jerked away from him as I finished.
“You stay and count to 60 after I leave. Then you can leave. You tell no one of this, not your mamma or Simona. I will kill them if you do. You want that to happen?” I tried to hold my tears before answering him, I was scared and shook my head no. I couldn’t get words to escape from my mouth. Tyrese headed towards the door but before opening the door he said one last thing, “You have the mark of my life mate, now you can be in my pack when you’re older. It’s better I mark you now before some other pack comes in. In a way, I just saved you. I’m a high rank in my pack, my mark will protect from other packs. They are just for lone wolves o destroy. You’ll thank me one day.”
I sat down install, flashes of my loss of innocence haunted my thoughts. I didn’t count to 60 like he ordered, I just cried quietly to myself as minutes slip away. I wasn’t afraid of being caught by a male in here, just afraid that Tyrese would come back and violate me. Tyrese never returned, no other male came in to use the restroom. I wasn’t sure how much time had went by but I was sure my mom was looking for me.
I was too afraid to pry myself from the sticky and filthy restroom floor. But I had to leave at some point. “Where was Simona? She was supposed to protect me?” I pondered, more tears escaped from my eyes. I heard the door open and my heart began to race. “He’s back!” I thought. I saw a man coming closer to the stall I was hiding in.
The door opened a little as I was blocking it from opening completely. “Are you okay little girl?” a concern male asked. I mumbled out no. The man made a step closer but I jerked myself from the floor in a flash and backed myself next to the toilet. “Did someone hurt you? I’m not going to hurt you, I want to help you. Are you parents around?” The man asked. I shrugged my shoulder as I stared at him with fear in my eyes. “Let’s go find your parents.” Said the man as he extended his hand out. I refuse to take his hand, I wasn’t sure about him since I was just raped by a male the same age as him. “It’s okay, you don’t have to take my hand. Just come out of there at least.” I carefully made steps towards him, he slowly backed away to give more room to exit the stall.
I was finally out but was frozen in fear still. I wouldn’t take another step. “What happen to you?” The man questioned me. I remember what Tyrese said about killing my mom and Simona if I ever told anyone. I lied telling the guy some kids were bullying me. “They are just cowards. Anyone who picks on another are cowards. Let’s go find your parents, you’re safe now.”
No one knew the truth, they all thought I was just bullied that day. In ways I was. I stayed to myself for the rest of the summer, I didn’t go out much. I stayed in my room stared at the window, worried Tyrese would return. My mom notice the change, she figured it was just puberty. It was anything but.
A week after the attack Simona came over for a training session. She found me curled up in a ball on my bed. I saw her take a whiff of the air then she gasped. Simona stood frozen in my doorway for a few moments before dropping to her knees. She sobbed uncontrollably, burying her face in her palms. I remain silent, at the moment I knew that she knows. I later learned about lycans can release certain pheromones. Tyrese released a life mate pheromones when he raped me. No other lycan will dare date me, they can smell his scent on me. “I’m sorry! I am sorry! I promised you..” Simona cried but I tuned her out. I was angry at her for not being there but then again..I shouldn’t be. Ridden with guilt, that was the last time I seen Simona. She cuts off tides, leaving my mom heart broken. Simona could never forgive herself, she left town and her pack.
Months after Simona left, she sent me a letter:
Dear Clarissa, I can’t forgive myself ever. I should have been near you at all times. I promised your papà I would protect you from Tyrese but I failed him. Reasons why I wanted you to stay away from him cause he’s a predator. He hunts for the weakest prey so he could dominate it. They normally stalk the children of lone wolves, once picking their target, they kill the lone wolf to take ownership of the child prey. To prevent other packs from accepting a decreased lone wolf’s offspring, they mark them regardless of their age. He marked you as a life mate, you are his mate for life. No other lycan can be your mate. You’ll have to marry him when you’re older. This can’t be undone unless Tyrese dies. You’ll be tied to him as long as he breaths. I was supposed to prevent this from happening… I am sorry.. I’m sorry for failing you.