Borage, I regret to say. Greta was taken by aliens.

 

 

Say what? Aliens? They took her why? Can’t you just use your special alien magic to bring her back?

 

 

Doesn’t work like that Borage. I can return her. She in danger like Lindy if I don’t.

 

 

Of course I want you to return Greta. I care about her and those brats need her.

 

 

And Lindy? It’s not too late. Why not her too? The journey will be long. You will be alone for great time.

 

 

No Lindy. They can keep her crazy ass. This chili is FIRE! Woo!

 

 

I no understand why your food so spicy. Don’t feed this to my girls. This harmful for my kind!

 

 

Like I say Borage, journey will be long. I will be gone for great time. You will have to care for the kids.

 

 

Please no kill the kids. You stupid, Borage. I have healthy foods ready for kids, no spices for my girls. It harmful for young aliens. Remember this Borage. They can die. Listen, okay?

 

 

Pedro left to go return Greta home and I’m left alone with these annoying brats. They were at school and it was just me and Mordecai. Pedro left a long list of foods I can’t feed his precious alien kids. Those 2 are the most annoying of all. No spicy food cause it can kill them. Blah blah blah. Let those brats live a little! I’m craving some Ceviche for tonight!

 

 

I taught Morde how to walk. I’m feeling pretty proud about myself now.

 

 

I dressed Mordecai in his bear suit that Greta got for him for Spooky day. I thought he would be all cute and cuddly if he wore it like the teddy bear on TV but all he did was cry and be stinky. Annoying brat.  I need Greta to handle this!

 

 

I figure Morde was old enough to start talking now. But this kid was difficult  This was usually Greta’s job. Teaching tots their skills wasn’t my thing. Kids are annoying, I should be out loving on some ladies instead of being at home with this smelly brat.

 

 

Now say Sexy Lady.

 

 

C’mon, it’s not that hard to say. Say HEY SEXY LADY, kid!

 

 

Mama.

 

 

Um.. no. Yo’ mama IS a sexy lady but that’s not what I mean, dumb kid…

 

 

Boobies!

 

 

Okay! That’s a good word to know. Were getting some where now!

 

 

Now say, Daddy.

 

 

C’mon…. You gotta call me daddy. I’m your dad.

 

 

………

 

 

Well screw you too kid. The feeling is mutual.. having you for a kid….

 

 

Fine, we’ll try another word. Say, Gimme your number girl.

 

 

Boobies!

 

 

I’m gonna play a little trick on PC. She thinks she’s soooo perfect.

 

 

Let’s see how perfect she is when she’s a little gassy. She’ll never know what I’m planning. He he he he.

 

 

I wonder what Bora Bora is up to.

 

 

Hey PC! Come sit on the new sofa! I want to see if you like it or not!

 

 

Uhhhhhhhhhhhh…. OK!

 

 

Hmm this does feel nice. I kinda like this new sofa seat. Where did this new room come from?

 

 

What the? This sofa… it made a fart sound! Or was this me? I didn’t fart! What’s going on?! Bora Bora?

 

 

Eww PC! You need to stop eating so much beans! You’re farting on the new sofa! Ha ha ha ha ha!

 

 

I didn’t fart! You put a whoopee cushion under my seat! I’m telling daddy on you! DADDY! BORA BORA PLAYED A FART PRANK ON ME!

 

 

I didn’t like how Bora Bora could be so cruel to my baby cake. Farting pranks? No one does that to my baby girl and gets away from that. So I had to put the law down on that alien brat. How dare she makes baby cake look like a fool.

 

 

But daddy?! Why does she always get special treatment?! It was just a funny prank! She thinks she’s so perfect and she’s not!

 

 

My baby cake IS perfect! There’s nothing funny about a fart prank when it’s done on my princess!

 

 

But I guess fart pranks would be funny to butt baby like YOU. I never wanted to have you and that evil green brat in the first place! You and your twin almost ruin my perfect body! I wish Pedro didn’t have to leave so I wouldn’t have to deal with you!

 

 

Daddy? You didn’t want to have me and Luna? You really don’t mean that do you, daddy?

 

 

What are you looking at PC! I hate your face! You’re not perfect! I don’t care what daddy says!

 

 

Nothing.. Daddy said I am perfect. He also said he didn’t want you and Luna. You’re a butt baby, ha ha ha ha.

 

 

Daddy doesn’t mean what he said. He’s a idiot. That’s what my Suziu said. Never believe what daddy say cause he’s a idiot. Daddy loves me and Luna. My Suziu loves me and Luna too.

 

 

Daddy is just blinded by your ugly face to realize that. 

 

 

But at least I have TWO parents! I have a daddy AND a Suziu! You don’t have a MOM! I bet your ugly poopy face scared her off! 

 

 

I do have a mom! And I don’t have a poopy face! You have a poopy face!

 

 

Then where is she? Invisible? Your mom didn’t like you so she left you! YOU’RE NOT SO PERFECT AFTER ALL!

 

 

My mommy isn’t invisible! She didn’t leave me! She went to go get help! I’m gonna prove it to you! You’re just jealous!

 

 

Ready to get whooped in this game, L2?

 

 

Whooped? Do you mean are you ready to get whooped?

 

 

Oh bring it on my good man. I’ve been playing this non stop for the few past days. I’m so gonna win this, L2!

 

 

Really? Is that why your grades suck so bad in school? You’re Asian, dude! You’re suppose to being having all A’s ya know. Ha ha ha!

 

 

Whatever dude! I’ll catch up in school. I just wanna beat you at this game. Watch this. You never expected this!

 

 

Oh really? Now, watch this, BL. Get ready to cry to Greta!

 

 

WHAT?! You cheated L2! How did you do that! That’s not fair! How the… Awww man!!!

 

 

You mad bro?

 

 

What are you looking at fish face?

 

 

I dunno but when I figure it out, I’ll let you know.

 

 

 Ah, van vesua! Cummuns nala?

 

 

Not now Luna, I’m dealing with the face of un perfect ugly right now.

 

 

Hey noobs, mind if I join in?

 

 

Fine. Whatever dad. L2 cheats.

 

 

You’re just a sore loser BL.

 

 

Oh L2 thinks he got moves. Well BMG got moves too, Moves you brats have never seen before.

 

 

Why are you home dad? Aren’t you suppose to be out scoring with the ladies?

 

 

Yeah dad! Why aren’t you with the ladies? Did the ladies not like you tonight?

 

 

The ladies will always love on this Montigo-Gelman sexiness, so you punks can hate on all you want. I have to stay and watch you brats for a while. Prepare to get spank in this game. I gonna have you both whipped up at this game like I did both your mommas.

 

 

Ugh dad! You’re using cheat codes too?! Is this cheating night or something?!

 

 

No BL, you just suck at this game!

 

 

Have I told you the time that your mom abandoned you when you were just a baby, Bruce-Lee?

 

 

That’s a low blow, dad. You’re throwing me off my game…. That’s not fair.

 

 

Hey…. I miss my mommy too. What happen to my mommy?

 

 

GAME BITCHES! I won! BMG IN THE HOUSE!

 

 

Where is my little Morde-boo?

 

 

Bora?

 

 

Oh where did little Morde-boo go? I wonder where?

 

 

Peek boo Bora!

 

 

There he is! There’s my little Morde-boo!

 

 

Bora peek boo!

 

 

Luna thinking: If I can build the perfect space ship then maybe I could travel back to my home world. Lunar Lakes. Would they accept me with my half human roots? I may possibly have genie powers. They could be so use to my people. If only Suziu could be more truthful to  Bora Bora and I about his plans. It appears only Bruce-Lee know but does he remember? I wonder if I can tap into his memory source. What could Suziu be hiding? Why does he want to use Borage? He’s a fucking idiot! I hate that I’m a part of useless human. Oh Suziu, please come back. I hate Borage, I refuse to acknowledged him as my other parent.

 

 

Luna, I can hear your thoughts! It’s in ENGLISH! Come how you only speak Simlish? I thought you didn’t know English? You can learn to love daddy! He may be a idiot but he isn’t that bad, Luna. At least he doesn’t run off like Suziu does! Now I know that you know English, you can stop being the weird alien and stop speaking Simlish. Were on Earth, not Lunar Lakes. You’ll never fit if you keep speaking Suziu’s native’s language.

 

 

Uhh shamoo ralla poo….

 

 

I don’t quite understand this game. Do I hit them?

 

 

I guess I do hit them. If the Brain llama will allow this I will give them a smack on the head.

 

 

Lickin’ lizards! They just keep coming back up! Oh mighty Brain llama why is this happening? I don’t understand!

 

 

This is crazy! Why do this Santa gnome ask for such abuse by this hammer? It’s like those movies on lifetime!

 

 

Okay, I think it’s done. We can be at peace now. I hope the llama gods are pleased with my actions. Maybe I’m one step closer to being the Queen.

 

 

Lickin’ lizards, they are back!! I don’t… Why? I don’t want to hit the poor guy! Brain llama?! What must I do?!

 

 

Brain llama? Where are you? You’re not responding to me! I do not know what to do! Do I keep hitting them? Are the llama god angry at me? I need help!

 

 

It’s not like to you to stop talking to me! I NEED YOU! This is very IMPORTANT! Do I hit the little guys? I NEED YOU!

 

 

Help? Anyone? DADDY??!!!!

 

 

Daddy can you read me a story? I can’t find Greta.

 

 

No, I’m tired.

 

 

Dad, where is Greta? We haven’t seen her since last night. We never went to bed this late.

 

 

Greta was taken by aliens, Pedro went to go get her back. I’m stuck with you brats for while until they return.

 

 

I think the aliens took the Brain llama. He stop talking to me.

 

 

But daddy, I need a bedtime story. I can’t sleep without a story. Can you please read me a story?

 

 

Sure baby cake, daddy will read you bedtime story. Go get ready for bed.

 

 

WHAT?! You just told ME you were too tired to read ME a bedtime story! Now you’re not tired to read PC a story?!

 

 

Well maybe I’m suddenly not tired anymore!

 

 

Daddy you’re just so unfair! Why is PC so special than the rest of us?! Why only SHE get a bedtime story?! I asked FIRST! You’re not being fair daddy! 

 

 

Fine! I’ll read you a story if it makes you stop being such annoying jerk brat of a kid! Go pick out a book. I’ll read it to you after I read PC a story.

 

 

NO! I asked FIRST! I want you to read me a story first! I don’t want you to read me a stupid story if PC have hers read before mines! You’re still not being fair daddy!

 

 

C’mon Bora Bora, just pick a book. You always wanted dad to read you a story.

 

 

Shut up nerd! This isn’t how I wanted it! I wanted it to be PERFECT! Stupid PC ruins EVERYTHING!

 

 

Goodnight daddy, I love you.

 

 

Who the fuck are you?!

 

 

Dad, that’s Lilah. She’s my twin sister. You’re silly dad.

 

 

I don’t remember you having a twin sister. Why is she wearing a fancy dress and cowboy boots to bed?

 

 

I didn’t know I had 7 kids. I thought I only had 5. I read my baby cake her bedtime story while the others slept.

 

 

I gave her a kiss as she fell asleep. She look so peaceful. My sleeping beauty. I hope she has sweet dreams, sweet dreams as sweet as she is.

 

 

That should be me that daddy is reading a story to. I hate PC so much! I will get daddy to love even if I have to destroy PC!

 

 

I also had get Mordecai to sleep as well. All he did was cry and wouldn’t shut up. So I grabbed a copy of PlaySim and showed him pics of sexy ladies and he drifted off sleep to dream about all the sexy ladies that he just saw. That’s how you get a baby to sleep. Nude magazines equals sweet dreams.

 

 

 

Then it was time for to go the bed finally. Alone. It would be nice to have some hot lady in my bed to give my loving to.

 

 

But dealing with the kids is preventing this from happening. How long will it be before Pedro can return with Greta? I’m already starting to miss the weird old lady and the rapist alien. I hate being all alone in this house with snot nosed brats. I got my loving to give to all the lonely ladies in Starlight Shores. It’s selfish to keep all this sexiness to myself. Hey you sexy lady reading this, want some of this loving? I have plenty to share. Don’t be shy. I see you smiling and blushing. It’ll be gentle or rough if you’re into that. What’s your number girl? HEY! don’t click the X. I’m just playing… I love you!

 

 

BONUS : Borage has a new room added to his home, Entertainment Room.

 

Picture of the house